When the going gets tough

The last two months have been one for the books. All my greatest fears came to fruition. Life has been unkind to the people I love and the people I thought I could depend on in the worst of times have turned out to be people I could no longer have in my life. It was an easy decision to remove them immediately. My life has no room for anything but love, encouragement, and support. I also lost something so precious to me that I thought I’d finally found. It was found and lost before there was even time to process what happened. But this particular feeling will pass in a matter of time. 

A year or two ago I wouldn’t have been able to cope with any of this with the stress of school. But I have learned that even though it feels like everything around me is going to hell, my life doesn’t stop. It keeps moving forward. Deadlines still come and go. I still have goals to meet and things to accomplish that I know my future self will be grateful for. I’ll be happy knowing I kept going even when all these crazy things were happening around me. 

I was naive to think that just because I connected with some people like I never had before because of my trip las year that they would be in my corner when I needed them. I have learned though that the people who continuously cheer me on through the good, the bad, and the ugly, are people that keep me pointed in the right direction and are people I need in my life always. 

So I’ve pushed on because you have to. I continue to give the world the best that I have and to some it won’t ever be enough but that doesn’t matter. All that matters is that I know I’ve given my best. I continue to be kind, honest, and open minded and those small actions will keep bringing good things and new opportunities into my life and slowly but surely I’ll keep building on my goals and dreams. 

In other news: I’ve buried myself into work more than I probably should but it’s been the biggest blessing as it keeps me preoccupied and motivated to keep being better. I’m happy that after only five months in I’ve already accomplished a goal I never communicated verbally. It’s encouraging and I couldn’t be happier with how my first five months of post graduation work is turning out. I followed my intincts to stay home and save money on a term position and in return I am gaining valuable experience in a fast paced environment that will lead me somewhere even bigger after the term ends. It is too early to say what that looks like right now but I am open to whatever comes my way.